You're Lebanese, you're Orient!

The second season of Glee is over. And if there is something that every viewer (that I know of, my claims always so scientific!!) agrees on is that the best thing about it has been Santana Lopez (Naya Rivera).

Santana started in the first half of the first season being a filling character without any other trait than being the traitor than can give information to Sue at any point without having to explain too much. In the second half, she and Brittany started having the one-liners that audiences (and I include myself proudly) adore. So much that when the second season started they had been promoted to regulars, something that Mike "dancing-should-not-look-like-a-disease" Chang could not achieve let alone Matt "transferred-to-another-school-and-never-brought-up-again" Rutherford. 

However and given that Glee is a show with 2,591 characters, some had necessarily to resent from this stepping in the spotlight from Santana. And I think it is safe to say that the character that has been relegated to oblivion has been Tina Cohen-Chang who holds the dubious honor of being the protagonist of the most bizarre (and not in a good way) moment of the season. I'm referring obviously to her rendition of "My Funny Valentine".

And I believe it is interesting to note that the first song Tina performed in the show was "I Kissed a Girl" by Katy Perry, something that led some viewers (ok, maybe just me) to believe that a lesbian plot was going to develop. And who knows if that was the case; after all, the stutter subplot is another of the weirdest things that have happened on the show. What is interesting is that now, the Lebanese (as Brittany would put it) character par excellence is Lima Heights Santana. Which makes me wonder if the lesbian plot was not fully given to Tina because she was not that interesting...

Santana, on the other hand, is not only the most interesting character in the show (even if she had the duty to say that haircut line in the finale giving way to another ass-weird situation) but also the best executed in terms of performance (I'm sorry Jane Lynch but stop crying for your sister, start bullying people and I'll love you again). So I'd like to start a FYC campaign for the Emmys. Naya Rivera, Best Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series!!

And just for comparison purposes, we can assure that Santana has gone from Poppita to Nicole while Tina has gone from Lil' Lily to... Exquisite Woo? Or the teacher who changed gender, whatever you prefer...

Santana's Evolution

And as it is physically impossible for me to think about Popular without renewing my vows with my Mary Cherry, here is a picture of her, just because. And by the way, Brittany still has a lot of work to do until she becomes a Mary Cherry but certainly, writing "My Cup" was a step in the right direction...

I just have to say...

... that she nails it every time.

Sadder news (therefore not deserving of visual aid) was the result of the awards. TV choices were:

a) Horrifically predictable: Are Claire Danes and Al Pacino collecting awards for these performances in 2056? It seems very likely.

b) Sad: "Boardwalk Empire" and "The Good Wife" taking awards from "Mad Men".
c) Outrageous: Betty White winning only because she is older than TV. Alec Baldwin winning for the fifth (!!) time in a row.
d) Wonderful (the exception): MODERN FAMILY!

In film things were:
a) Equally predictable but great: Natalie Portman.
b) Equally predictable and ok but not great: Colin Firth.
c) Equally predictable and I-don't-know-what-else-because-I-haven't-seen-The-Fighter: Melissa Leo and Christian Bale.
d) Apocalyptic: The King's Speech.

I fear. I don't want The King's Speech to win and it seems unavoidable. DOOM! DOOM!

Blonde Ambitions Part III (The "Older does not mean old" Pt.1)

Blonde TV actresses that have grown up can also be ambitious. Some of them have fared better than others through those ambitions nevertheless...

Elizabeth Perkins as Celia Hodes in Weeds

Celia is that neighbour we all want to have, don't we? If she is portrayed by Elizabeth Perkins I definitely want her close. She is so fun in the role (or was, I should say...) that even though in real life she would be annoying it is impossible not to love her on the show. Reading Elizabeth's Imdb page I only remember her in The Ring 2. (WARNING: Embarrasing story follows) I went to see The Ring 2 to the theatre (I had already seen the first one and I liked it) and in a magazine I had read that Sissy Spacek appeared in the film. It was curious because of her portrayal of Carrie in the homonymous film. Well, back then, I had not seen Carrie, and so I thought she was the actress playing the doctor in that scary needle scene (or was it a scary pair of scissors? Scary either way...). Yes, I thought Elizabeth Perkins was Sissy Spacek. And they do not look much alike actually...

Felicity Huffman (Lynette Scavo in Desperate Housewives)

Felicity Huffman is the only woman on this post to have been nominated for a Best Actress Oscar. Even so, she is not the most succesful of the lot by far. Right now, she seems condemned to play Lynette Scavo forever. Not that she's not good at it but her storylines are lately the most boring ones. Plus, Tom Scavo is possibly the most annoying character ever to appear on television. Nevertheless she will always be able to say that she worked with Paul Thomas Anderson... 

Julie Bowen as Claire Dunphy in Modern Family

And we encounter the third housewife in a row, the one without a known job, the magnificent Claire Dunphy. To be honest I'm more on Team Gloria but since she is not a blonde... Not to worry because my love for Claire is also great. Julie Bowen entered my life as Jack's I-want-to-dance-at-my-wedding-wife in Lost. Then she was the MILF on Weeds that allowed us to see Silas' on action (the gif is very small but if you saw the scene, you will remember it). For her future, she is set to appear on Horrible Bosses playing Kevin Spacey's wife if I recall correctly. Playing the wife of Kevin Spacey in a Jennifer Anniston /Jason Bateman (The Switch was quite endearing) comedy might not seem much but less is nothing...

Kelly Rutherford (Lily Van Der Woodsen Bass Humphrey... in Gossip Girl)

Lily could also be considered a housewife, only her chores consist on sitting at a table writing thank-you notes rather than kneeling to scrub the floors... I love Lily even when she is mean or has ulterior motives (once every two episodes) because Kelly's portrayal makes her so endearing... even when she's next to hateful-Rufus! Anyway Kelly has done a lot of films, a lot of TV and though her future seems to be solely occupied by Gossip Girl she will always be able to say that she was killed in a Scream film...Isn't that what every actress want?

Rosemarie DeWitt is Charmaine in "United States of Tara"

THE CHEAT FACTOR: Yes, I know she is not a blonde but it's my party and I'll cry if I want to. Besides, Rosemarie's talent is too big to be overlooked. I think that picture is from Rachel Getting Married where she also played a woman outshined by her sister craziness. She brings so much life and wit into Charmaine that it is impossible not to love the self-absorbed bitch she is. As to her ambitions, she had a great role on Mad Men and was very well received though not near as much (in quantity) as she deserved for her Rachel. She plays Ben Affleck's wife or girlfriend or something (they are in bed in the trailer) in The Company Men. And I fondly remember her as Miranda's mean co-worker in a Sex and the City episode...

To be continued...

Blonde Ambitions Part II (The Abortions)

Please, understand that the title of this post has nothing to do with Vera Drake's profession. What has been aborted were the careers of these TV blondes. Another thing these two girls have in common is their show ending this 2010. And so did their hopes to work...

Becki Newton was Amanda on Ugly Betty and she was hilarious. From killing one-liners ("I have pornographic memory") to physical comedy (her way of walking should have earned top billing) she was the funniest part about a show that, let's face it, was not very good. But alas, I loved it. And Amanda was (obviously) my favorite character. And poor Becki Newton got a leading role in a sitcom about a virgin (whom she was going to play) and she got pregnant. Maybe she thought the role was for an HBO epic in which she would play the Virgin Mary. Whatever her reasoning, the thing is that, in that particular case, a pregnant virgin was not what was required. So she was out of job (but with a baby, so she was happy nevertheless). We can only hope that once those stretch marks have faded she will make us laugh again.

Emilie de Ravin, on the other hand, was never much fun on her show (Lost, for the two people who did not follow it). She was cute, sweet and on one flashback, a brunette. But she was never fun per se. Maybe with the fake peanut butter... Anyway, she was blonde and beautiful and it looked like she was going to have a career in movies. She appeared on Michael Mann's Public Enemies (a film which also featured current go-to girl Carey Mulligan but they could be pointing a gun to my head and I still would not remember her) and on that hey-it's-Robert-Pattinson film Remember me and then she fell off the side of the Earth! Ironic after starring in a film which title is imploring us not to forget her...

Conclusion: These two girls were promised a paradise that was lost. Time will tell if they can regain it... (How awful it is to make a Milton reference when all you have read of his work are the titles?)

To be continued...

Blonde Ambitions Part I (The Antichrist)

If you were expecting some kind of cool Antichrist (like Charlotte Gainsbourg with a talking fox) this is not your lucky day. This is just your regular Katherine Heigl Antichrist. Inspired by Human Dramedy's wonderful take on a couple of brunettes, I thought I would do the same for the blondes of the world, the TV world that is. Blonde actresses working (now or sometime) on television and how have they fared in their careers. And as I compiled the list of the actresses I would like to discuss, I realized that a post was not enough to accomplish such a task. So here it is the first part of this humble project. (sidenote: there is nothing more humble than calling yourself humble) And as I do in life, I have chosen to start with the more disgusting part: the black-void blonde ambition.

Katherine Heigl first appeared in my life as Izzie Stevens on Grey's Anatomy and I'm proud to say I loved her! Her character was nothing if not lovable and someone playing a doctor so nice has to be nice in real life... Ha! The magic of television is prone to fool you. After becoming one of the most loathed characters ever she eventually left the show that gave her everything and turned into a "movie star". I could be Ok with that. Celebrities are entitled to bitchiness according to Bette Davis' and Joan Crawford's gospels... But if you leave a decent (or semi-decent by the time she left) show to star in films such as 27 dresses, The Ugly Truth or Killers, be prepared to be hated by me. And to be fair, I have not seen any of those films but this is my blog and I can have prejudices if I want to!! If you don't like it, stop reading and go watch High School Musical for all I care!! Blah! Crazy!!

Anyway, Katherine Heigl, I hate you. I loved you once, though. But don't worry, it doesn't look like my love for you is ever coming back... So this is it. The first Blonde Ambition and she's burnt in hatred flames!

To be continued...