I came, I saw mother fucking Snakes on a mother fucking plane and Samuel L. Jackson kicked their mother fucking asses. Everything the marketing team advertised about this movie was 100% accurate. It was by far the best film about snakes I have ever seen, way better than say Anaconda or Anaconda 2: The Blood Orchid...but I guess that really isn't saying very much. The scares were great, the snakes were crazy and the comedy routines of Kenan Thompson (Saturday Night Live) and David Koechner (Anchorman) were hilarious.
F.B.I. agent Nelville Flynn (Samuel L. Jackson) is tasked to escort a federal witness (Nathan Phillips), from
I don't like snakes, and I found myself a little squirmy when I saw where some of these poor souls were getting bitten. I kid you not within the first twenty minutes of the attacks I saw a half naked woman with a rattler attached to her boob, I saw another guy who walked in to take a piss and got a python attached to his y'know python. Oh, man that one hurt the most; they really wanted you to see the agony on that guy, ouch! Another dude got bitten on the ass, hell the damn snakes were biting people's eyes out and slithering into their mouths. It was pretty horrific; I kept saying to myself how the hell does a snake do that. Anyway, the CGI was pretty crappy; I could usually tell what was a real snake and what was fake. But that’s a good thing cause if it looked too real I think I would have crapped my pants. It wasn't as badly written as I thought it was going to be but again this isn't Oscar material here, and it was kind of funny seeing Nurse Hathaway from E.R., Juliana Margulies, trying to keep it real as she chucks a hatchet at a couple snakes.
So if you're looking for a couple of good scares, some funny bits then go and check out what has to be the king schlock movie of the decade.
Grade: 3 Buckets
Saturday, August 19, 2006
MOVIE REVIEW: Snakes On a Plane
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